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Workout Bae

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Buck: “…and one and two and three and four! Hold it, Ada, holdddd it! Feel the burn baby!”

Me: “Ahhhh, I can’t do this anymore!”

Yeah, this wasn’t exactly the way I imagined Buck would have me on my back screaming, but there I was a few moments ago, sprawled on a yoga mat, extremities paralyzed from the pain of utilizing muscles I didn’t even know existed. No pain no gain right?

I had to beg Buck for a fifteen-minute break, so I’m using the time to get caught up with you, my adoring fans. (Besides, I’m so tired I’m going to pass TF out when I get home.)

So, this is my third time training with Buck and while I’m exhausted from our forty-minute set that’s supposed to eventually give me buns like Beyonce, I still have the presence of mind to notice that he isn’t being as flirty with me as he usually is.

I mean yes, I’m a sweaty, disheveled mess right now but this makeup could withstand anything and this bad bitch does not have B.O.!

So what’s up with workout bae?

There’s definitely chemistry between us, but I’m getting the sense that he’s holding back. 

But why though? 

Unless he’s feeling guilty about Tony? Hmm… maybe I revealed too much at our last session but Tony frustrates me sometimes, and Buck is just so easy to talk to.

Maybe it wasn’t smart to tell a crush about my boyfriend, even if the boyfriend in question seems to have a strange butter fetish.

I’m not kink-shaming but whatever he’s doing with the butter doesn’t include me so I’ve got every right to be upset. And it just has to be something kinky because no one has liked that much butter since your fave cooking channel fired their racist chef!

Anyway, today kind of sucks, and while I’m glad I got a workout in, I really miss the great vibes between Buck and me. Maybe I’ll just go home and eat my emotions in the biggest bowl of pasta seen since that old lady swam around in a tub of spaghetti in that old Patch Adams movie.

No no, I can’t do that… pasta’s a no-go on keto, ughh!

Sigh… I feel like I could cry. Why am I so emotional today anyway?! And if any of you have the nerve to ask me if it’s that time of the month, I. Will. Cut. You. 

Besides, it’s not. I heard that being on Keto can send your body through some interesting changes, physical and emotional.

Like my co-worker, Kevin, told me he tried Keto once and his breath was kickin’ for about a week, but then it went away. Apparently, that can happen and it’s because your body can increase the production of acetone, which by the way is a ketone body.

What’s a ketone body?

Well, I used to think it was just someone who’s really fit but it turns out that it’s actually “water-soluble molecules that contain the ketone groups produced from fatty acids by the liver.” At least according to Wikipedia. 

This is pretty much the basis for Ketosis (Keto), which “is the biochemical process through which organisms produce ketone bodies by breaking down fatty acids and ketogenic amino acids.” Info I also got from the ‘University of Wiki’ lol.

Anyway, before this turns into a science class, let me get my ass back out there and the attention back on me. 

Buck has no idea who he’s playing with and I always get what I want.

Avocado, out!

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